Yes, Mental Health in Your 20s is About More Than Having a Job
Quarterlifers aren't supposed to be this unhappy
The New York Times published an op-ed this week entitled, “People in Their 20s Aren’t Supposed to Be This Unhappy” by Peter Coy in which Coy speaks with David Blanchflower, a Dartmouth economics professor, about his data on the evident drop in the well-being of Quarterlifers. The data saddens them both and yet also seems to confound them.
Coy writes:
“Blanchflower said the mental health of 20-somethings began to deteriorate noticeably around 2011. That made some sense because the United States was in a jobless recovery; the high unemployment rate made it hard for young people to find good jobs — or any jobs. He said he doesn’t fully understand why things continued to worsen as the job market strengthened.”
I’m so accustomed to hearing this genuine confusion around Quarterlifers’ diminishing mental health that the article doesn’t surprise me. But, I can’t help but feel that while the commentators are concerned and truly interested in understanding what’s wrong, they are—like many of us—also so habituated to their worldview as to entirely miss the larger issues right under their noses. There are so many aspects of culture and life that contribute to a sense of well-being beyond being part of the economy.
I’m not sure exactly when it happened, but at some point, likely long ago, the first part of adulthood became so wedded to economic involvement as to make financial productivity almost synonymous with adulthood itself. It’s not just the economists who struggle. Many people grapple with understanding how people in this stage of life could be unhappy (this unhappy) if the economy is doing well. Within society at large, being a success in one’s 20s means being a part of the economy—that is, being someone who makes money, pays rent, and buys things. Those who can’t do this are “emerging adults” or in “extended adolescence.”
We’re all familiar with the question every college graduate hears on repeat as soon as they’re finished with school: “What do you plan to do next?” That question invariably means, “What are your job prospects?” Meanwhile, the admonition to “get a job!” is synonymous with “grow up!”
What a soulless way to conceive of existence. What a dull invitation to an independent life. How depressing that the expectations of Capitalism have so utterly infiltrated our sense of being an adult that we can’t separate a stage of life from its role in the economy.
Coy does go on to consider, as frequently happens in commentary on the mental health struggles of children and Quarterlifers, the COVID lockdown and social media as other explanations.
All true, yes. Yet still quite lacking in a larger social critique.
Conservative commentators frequently talk about the loss of religion and family values as causes of depression among younger people. I rarely agree with the majority of these conclusions. But at least they’re taking culture into account. The more common explanations of mental health statistics are deaf to the world in which Quarterlifers live.
What if children and 20-somethings didn’t have to vigilantly protect themselves against getting shot on campuses and concerts? What if they didn’t have to worry about the possibility of being beaten, killed, or arrested unnecessarily by those “sworn to serve and protect”? What if they didn’t have to consider the realities of climate change while thinking about where to buy a house someday or whether or not to have children? What if they were certain that their reproductive rights were guaranteed and any gender-affirming care they might need would be private and respected medical decisions? What if they knew that their right to vote was secure and not under constant attack largely because of their age and/or the color of their skin? Simply put — what if society actually listened to what they wanted?
The mental health of 20-somethings isn’t just about a thriving economy or their use of social media. The society that Quarterlifers live in generally sees them as second-class citizens, as people too often expected to be perfect adults but simultaneously not yet old enough to have legitimate opinions. Quarterlifers’ rights to their bodies are under constant attack. Their schools are under constant attack. Their values are under constant attack. They are worried for their own well-being, the well-being of their friends, and the well-being of the planet where we all live. They are feeling people in a world riddled with suffering.
When Quarterlifers’ reality is not validated and their mental health is reduced to their employment status, why would anyone expect them to feel excited about life and eager to be a part of the world? I’d be depressed too.
If society were to conceive of mental health more broadly, what would improve your sense of well-being?
I heard a very interesting thing at the eye doctor's the other day in conversation with one of the 50-somethings working there. We were discussing the relationship between money/currency and 20-somethings. She mentioned how frustrating it was to her to have younger employees coming into the office expecting to reach her position and pay level much more rapidly than she did. I and my partner did our best to compassionately receive her frustration and additionally offer some 20-something (and early 30-something) perspective. Starting at 45,000 and gradually, over the course of 20-odd years, climbing the ranks to a terminal salary of 115,000 is no longer acceptable. In the last 5 years (only!) the cost of an 'entry' level home in my neighborhood increased from about $300,000 to around $600,000. That's a down payment of 60-120,000 dollars, and a monthly mortgage (with the current interest rate) of, what, 4000 odd dollars? My partner after many years in a 'high-paying' industry had a salary of over 80,000 and a take home of about 4,000 a month after taxes. So how much does someone our age /actually/ have to make to afford a home with dignity? The ability to feed oneself comfortably? To go on the occasional adventure? To buy new books released by people whose voices we value? Probably a minimum of 115,000, at least in our area. Meanwhile, the older woman's house was paid off, and many of her other overhead costs were lower (I understand of course that she is worried about and saving for end-of-life costs which are also rising rapidly—a separate, though related, conversation), so that same 115,000 goes /much/ further for her than the same amount of money does for a Quarterlifer today. We are officially in an upside-down climate, where people at the start of their careers need to be making their terminal salaries upfront, and then gradually decrease over time as they acquire the various fixed assets which are more or less required in our society in order to fully participate in the public forum as a citizen. How do we hold with compassion the frustration of our elders? How do we reasonably advocate for the complete transformation of a narrative which wholly does not accommodate our present context any longer? Is UBI really enough? "The whole system must be dismantled and done over." Yes, of course. Can this be done without further global catastrophe, without guillotines? We are already in global catastrophe. I hold the immense and mounting tension, precariousness of our situation and pray for an unimaginable transcendent option to set us down a golden path where all can achieve a life of bliss and dignity. At times, praying like this feels like the only reasonable option left at present. And yet, it too feels inadequate.
I really resonated with this piece as I am 27 years old and my whole adult life has been centered around the question of "What are you going to do next?" with the underlying context being: How are you going to be more successful in this capitalist society? How are you going to market yourself and mold yourself to make money? When I was 26 I resigned from my teaching job to pursue a different career. Before beginning a GIS bootcamp, I dedicated about 6 months to taking a bit of a break from working, and to planning my wedding, and going on my honey moon. After that, I did my bootcamp, and then began to apply for the jobs.
In total, I spent about one year unemployed and a lot of the time, I felt worthless and useless because I wasn't making money. I didn't want to feel this way and I realized that feeling this way was quite sad because my worth as a human being is not equivalent to the amount of money I earn or do not earn. My partner and I were living paycheck to paycheck on his salary, and he mentioned feeling like we were failing as a couple because we weren't making the kind of money needed to buy a home.
We are both quarterlifers and we both feel a great amount of anxiety in regards to making money.
I feel angry that for a while I felt useless and worthless because I didn't make money. I feel angry that the values in the society I live in impacted me so much that I felt this way.